Dreams to the Past
by Shinigami29
Summary: [semiAU] Beast Boy is having dreams of a past he only knows through the stories his father used to tell him... stories he wants to forget. Will the only person he could ever think of be able to help him?
1. Prologue

_Disclaimer:_ I don't own anything Teen Titans… if I did, I wouldn't be here, on my knees, begging you not ta rat me out… I DUN WANNA GET SUED!

**Prologue**

_Lilly concentrated all her powers around her, trying to clear her mind of images of her two sons that were so cruelly taken from her at their birth… it was a vain attempt, as last night's nightmare seemed too much for her._

_With a sigh she lowered herself to the ground, settling with letting herself be absorbed into the silence of the jungle as she watched her reflection in the stream. Was this really what she wanted? To be spending the day of her death reminiscing?_

"_Love," a sleepy voice said behind her. She didn't look up, sensing the older teen walk up to her, sitting down before he wrapped muscled arms around her waist. "You're up early… trying to get an early start to the day?"_

"_The day of my death seems a good one to think," she whispered, almost too quiet to hear it herself; she knew he heard it. He heard everything._

"_Yes…" he nodded, burying his face in her shoulder; her dark red hair moved with the wind, brushing over his bare back. "Our day of destruction, finally here…"_

_She frowned at his choice of words, turning around to look at him. "Our day of destruction?" she questioned. "Love, today is my day, not yours."_

"_I cannot live without you, Lilly," he grinned at her. "Either I die without today, or I chase after you threw the recesses of time forever…"_

"_Chase after me," she smiled. "Chase after me, and be happy while you still can; like you and I could never be together…"_

"_Are you happy love?" he questioned her. She nodded shyly, a blush creeping over her porcelain cheeks. "Then all is well… your happiness drives me to live… you're death will drive me to despair…"_

"_Don't live selfishly Tai," she shook her head at him. "You have others to live for."_

_Tai's grin grew; "If to live selfishly means I get to hold you like this for eternity, than selfish I shall be…" he moved to kiss her, but she turned her head._

_She looked to the ground, her crimson cheeks matching her enchanting eyes as he growled under his breathe. Frustration poured off of his entire being, but he mastered it with a few slow, deep breathes._

_She smiled at his efforts._

_He lifted her chin to stare into her crimson pools with deep emerald eyes. "Why do you turn?" he mumbled. "You love me, no?"_

"_Yes," her breath caught in her throat as she explored his eyes… frustration. Love. Hurt. Confusion. "Yes, I love you very, very much… but…"_

"_But what, Lilly-Love?" he asked, leaning towards her._

_She looked deeper into his eyes, and saw understanding. "I don't want to hurt you Tai… not like the others…"_

"_You won't hurt me," his arm tightened around her waist, pulling her into his lap. "I'm your chosen one? Remember?"_

"_The chosen one I will bring pain to with my first acts of love," she quoted. "Love said so, so did Knowledge… why don't you ever listen?"_

"_I do listen," he rubbed his nose against hers, and she closed her eyes. She still couldn't believe what simple sensations made her feel around him… "Our love is undeniable… it's written in the stars, it's carved in our bones… believe me love this is what's meant to be…"_

"_I don't want to hurt you," she repeated. "I would never forgive myself…"_

"_Lilly," his voice took on a slight growl. "If not on the day of destruction, will you grant me no peace? One kiss is all I ask of you to show your love to me… One kiss to haunt the rest of my dreams, and to let me die in peace… please Lilly-Love, if you do not let me die with you, let me die with you in my heart…"_

_Opening her eyes once more, she saw steely determination in his emerald orbs as he finally broke through the invisible barrier that had always separated them… their lips met with a gentle passion, moving in sync and whispering oaths of love._

_Lilly pulled away from him when she felt him go rigid, but he only grinned at her, longer than normal eye teeth slipping over his lip. "I'm fine love…" was all he told her, before pulling her to him again; she relented, allowing herself to do the things she had only dreamed about…_

_Her hands had only just entangled themselves in his wheat blond hair when she pulled away again, her cheeks like roses and her eyes to the ground._

"_Love," he growled again in frustration, but distanced him from her. "I am sorry Love, I went too fast… but I am only a man. Please forgive me, and let me thank you…"_

"_Not that Tai…" she muttered. He raised a brow at her; only to turn when he heard little feet running towards them… he was almost thrown to the ground when a hyperactive ball of blond hair and green eyes was catapulted at him._

"_Daddy!" the girl giggled, squeezing her tiny little arms around his neck. "Tell me a stowy! Pwease Daddy!"_

"_Later Raija," he laughed, placing her on the ground. "I'm talking to Lilly now, okay?" Raija blinked, and then turned to look at the red haired girl behind her father's back._

"_Lilly-Lady?" she asked._

"_Yes Raija?" Lilly asked; she wished the little girl had been her own… but it was not to be. She and Tai both had separate lives and families, and it was only by chance that they had found their true loves in each other…_

"_Make me fly?" Raija asked excitedly; the little blond started to jump up and down, and Lilly complied, using her powers to levitate the girl above the ground for a few moments; Raija squealed in glee, only to run off once she had been placed safely on the ground._

"_I wish she had been ours," Tai muttered, wrapping his arms around her again. "I wish that I had not had to marry Katja… I wish we could be together forever…"_

"_Those are a lot of wishes," Lilly wrapped her arms around his neck. "You should be careful… you never know, one of them may come true…"_

"_I don't care…" he whispered into her neck. She giggled, moving her eyes down his back… that's when she noticed it._

"_Tai?" she asked._

"_Yes?"_

"_Since when do you have a raven on your back?" she dropped one hand to trace carefully over the bird's beak._

"_What?" he sat up straighter, looking into her eyes with confusion. "I don't-"_

"_A mark of my love," Lilly spoke with realization. "Now you'll die with me in you're heart… just as you wanted…"_

_**Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Bee-**_

Beast Boy slammed a hand down on his clock, getting up slowly. Grumbling under his breath, he made sure the alarm was on, and then left the confines of his bed with a yawn. He crossed his room to the full length mirror on the opposing side, dodging random stacks of chaos and disaster.

He frowned as he looked at his appearance. Clothed only in loose sweatpants, his muscles pulled taunt underneath his greened skin, he was a sight to see: Almost perfect proportions, eyes inherited from his father, hair inherited from his mother, and skin inherited from an antidote.

He turned slowly to look at his birthmark; a raven. It was placed on his lower back, just to the left, with wings spread and violet eyes glaring into the distance.

With a sigh he started to wade his way through the mess of his room to his closet to find some clothes.


	2. Tall Tales

_AN: _if I, Ami, don't update in more than three or four days, and you REALLY wanna read this story, then I, Ami, advise you to start Emailing me ASAP and pestering me to continue before I, Ami, lose my muse. It has happened many times before, and it'll happen many times in the future.

**Tall Tales**

He waltzed into the kitchen with a grin and a hello, before digging out his soy milk from the fridge. After grabbing a bowl and spoon, he joined Starfire and Cyborg at the table.

"Friend Beast Boy?" Star asked innocently as he poured his cereal.

"Yeah Star?" he replied, giving her a toothy smile.

"You are taller," she noted. Cocking her head to the side, she looked at his form. "Have you stretched in your sleep?"

"You mean grew?" Cyborg offered.

"Yes!" Star leaned towards him and gave him a hug in appreciation… just as Robin walked in. "Thank you Friend Cyborg!"

"What's this all about?" Robin asked, staring at Cyborg a little longer and harsher than necessary.

"The little grass stain here's not so little anymore," Cyborg sneered. Beast Boy glared at him.

"I'm not a grass stain!" he growled.

"Your right," the robot's cybernetic eye glinted just as demonically as the real one. "You're just a little twig!"

"Take that back ya ol' tinker mobile!" the green boy stood up now, forgetting about his cereal.

"Only a twig could survive eating the crap you eat!" Cyborg stood up as well.

"Friends!" Starfire tried to interfere. "Please don't fight!"

"_Better than killing animals!"_ Tai yelled, agreeing with Beast Boy.

"Yeah!" Beast Boy agreed. "Much better than killing animals!"

Cyborg blinked, looking at Beast Boy in confusion. The shape shifter just grinned in victory… then Cyborg spoke.

"Um… BB?" the robot asked.

"Giving up already?" Beast Boy taunted. Yay! He was finally winning!

"Not that BB…" he noticed Robin looking at him strangely as well. He looked at Star who seemed as clueless as him.

"What?" He took a small step back; he didn't like this… was Slade behind him or something? He checked quickly, before looking back at them. "What!"

"Who were you agreeing with?" Robin asked.

Beast Boy blinked then looked to his right to find Tai… but the blond boy wasn't there. He almost fell to the ground as he realized what had happened…

Had he actually imagined Tai? _Here?_

"I've gotta go!" He squeaked, transforming into a falcon and zooming out of the room. He heard his friends calling after him, but didn't stop. Where could they go that they wouldn't find him?

_The roof! _He thought. _No one's ever up there! And it's light out! They would never suspect me of going out into the daylight!_

He silently cheered to himself as he headed up to the roof, making a note to do a victory dance before solving his problem… but as he got outside, he realized why he never really went up there… it was _so_ bright.

"Bah…" he groaned, transforming back to his regular self. He covered his eyes and started pacing, not really paying attention to the atmosphere around him. "Okay… back on track… Tai's here… no, he's not real. He was a figment of my imagination, always has been, always will be… the problem lying in the fact that he was _here, outside _of my dreams… isn't there some law against that?"

He sighed, muttering profanities to himself. "Why were you outside of my dreams?" he questioned the morning sky as he stopped his pacing. He slowly leveled his eyes, getting use to the light. "Why did you leave my insanity? Does this mean that you'll stop haunting my sleep? Will you invade my real life?"

* * *

Raven woke up slowly that morning, her lavender eyes lazily taking in the clean lines of the tiles of her ceiling. She'd been having a nice dream… she'd been having it a lot recently, as it slowly took over her normal nightmares.

She used the minute concentration needed to remove her blankets and call a thin, aqua book to her side. Flipping open it's pages, she skimmed over the contents; the first pages were the details of her original nightmare, written and rewritten again and again in a messy hand, parts smudged out and redone. Nearly a quarter of the way in, the writing became calmer, more serene, as the words of her dream were poured out onto the white paper.

The details were still vague, but it helped her remember.

A massive raven with violet eyes would fly from the moon to greet her hand, only to shift and change, melding into the shadows. Eyes would forever glow and challenge, stepping back when she went forwards. Something happened during this time… maybe a conversation?

But then… then she tripped. Over her cape, a root, or just out of her own clumsiness she didn't know. But the figure would catch her, submerging them both into shadow… and the eyes, they changed. They shed their hard, challenging violet ways and turned soft, loving…

"… but which colour?" she mused. With a sigh she put the book back down, then got up to dress in her uniform. The leotard was draped over the back of her chair with her cape and belt, which she clipped on afterwards. Slipping her boots on last, she took a deep, calming breathe.

Should she meditate before or after she left?

"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos…" she whispered, feeling her feet rise above the ground. She searched her mind for any disturbance, and found none. Opening darkened orbs, she slowly slipped through the floor down to the living room.

_Am I finally gaining control? _She wondered. _Have I over powered Trigon at last?_

She rested her feet on the ground and walked towards the kitchen, only to find Starfire sitting cheerfully at the table. "Friend Raven!" the alien chorused. "You have awakened early… do you wish to make breakfast with me?"

"No Star," Raven smile, chuckling softly. She stopped when she noticed the toaster start to turn black, and returned to her stoic nature. The toaster returned to normal, and Star gazed at her with hurt eyes. "Maybe another time."

"Okay Friend Raven!" Star jumped up and hugged her tightly 'round the neck, almost strangling her.

"Can't… breathe…" Raven gasped, trying to conjure up the will to pry the alien off of her.

"Sorry…" she apologized, releasing the half-demon.

"It's alright Starfire," Raven forgave her. She decided she didn't want breakfast today. "I'm going to go up to the roof to meditate, alright?"

"Okay!" Star cheered, giggling to herself. Raven rolled her eyes, pulling her hood up over her eyes as she decided to take the long route to the roof: walking.

Her trip was uneventful, disturbed only by an annoying beeping of Beast Boy's alarm clock as she passed the green boy's room. The raven from her dreams flashed before her eyes, accompanied by a slight pain.

Rubbing her forehead, she continued.

When she reached the roof, she spent a few minutes just basking in the light of the rising sun. She noticed with disappointment that it was already above the horizon… with a sigh, she pulled herself above the ground, folding her legs into her lotus position.

'_Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos…' _she chanted in her mind, closing her lovely eyes. _'Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos…'_

Her mantra continued, but the image of the raven didn't leave her mind… she couldn't place her finger on it, but there was something wrong with it. Where the wings too large? The beak too sharp? The eyes too menacing?

'_The eyes…' _she interrupted her chanting, looking up at the horizon. _'The eyes were different…'_

Before she could think how, the door behind her crashed open; she settled on the ground and turned, her cape floating around her… there stood Beast Boy, eyes shielded from the sun, not seeing her as he paced.

"Okay… back on track…" she heard him mutter. "Tai's here… no, he's not real. He was a figment of my imagination, always has been, always will be…"

She couldn't help but notice how distressed he looked.

"The problem lying in the fact that he was _here, outside _of my dreams… isn't there some law against that?" Sighing, he muttered words that made even her blushed. "Why were you outside of my dreams?" He slowly looked up towards the sky. "Why did you leave my insanity? Does this mean that you'll stop haunting my sleep? Will you invade my real life?"

Raven blinked, surprised; since when has Beast Boy's vocabulary been larger than 'tofu' and 'game station'?

"Calm down Beast Boy," he continued. "This is just… an imaginary thing… right? It'll go away… he won't bother me any more… I can go back to being regular old, green, tofu loving, all-round nice guy, Beast Boy…"

She couldn't stop the snort of laughter.

His reaction was instantaneous. Turning fast enough to get whiplash, he stared at her like a deer caught in head-lights.

"R-raven…?" she could tell how nervous he was from his voice… but at what? Did she know something that she shouldn't? Was there something about this mysterious Tai the team wouldn't like?

"Um… hi…" she tried to think of something to say… something that wouldn't be awkward or strange; she said the first thing that came to mind. "Have you gotten taller..?"


	3. Meditation Blues

_AN: _I have a request… feel free to disregard it if you wish, but I have a request nonetheless… if you review (and I know not all of you do), why not try telling me what you think will happen? I'm very curious what hoshi-ko88 thinks, as well as anyone else willing to tell me… and who knows? I might even take it into consideration… oh, and to settle just a little confusion… yes, BB and Raven's dreams are related, but they aren't the same.

**Meditation Blues**

Raven lowered her gaze in embarrassment. Those were supposed to be nice, conversation starting words? They were supposed to cover up anything she may know? They were supposed to-

"Hey Rave'!" she was snapped back to the world of the living as he spoke, and she looked at him again. He seemed to of calmed down, a sheepish smile on his lips and a careless look in his eyes. "Yeah... Star thinks I've grown too… hey! I think I'm taller than you now!"

She rolled her eyes, his previous mutterings out of her mind as she stepped up to him. She carefully looked up at him with a frown. "Darn… I think you might be right…"

"R-Rave?" he stuttered again; she was surprised when she saw the blush on his cheeks.

"Yes?" she asked, looking into his eyes… she'd never realized how many hues of green were in them.

_Hold up…_ she thought to herself. _Since when have I been close enough to-_

"I never took you as the kind of person to invade someone's personal space," Beast Boy said, once again mastering his stutter.

"That's the second time in thirty seconds that you've interrupted my train of thought," she glared before returning to her spot before he had arrived. She was here to meditate, nothing else.

"You always think!" he whined, following her. He sat on the edge of the roof as she suspended herself in the air. "Why don't you just hang out with everyone instead of coming up here? Do you hate our company that much?"

"Is that why you're up here?" Raven challenged. She grinned to herself when he didn't answer… it was always satisfactory when she won a battle of wits. Then she remembered his words.

'…_the problem lying in the fact that he was _here, outside_ of my dreams…'_

'_Why were you outside of my dreams?'_

'_Will you invade my real life?'_

"Who were you talking about anyway?" she asked as she started her mantra in head, willing her powers into control.

The sudden feeling of being trapped bombarded her senses, confusing her; she clutched at her skull, her empathic powers never welcome to her. Blackness overcame her vision as she felt herself fall, but she didn't bother with that… she just needed to get this feeling out of her head.

As her heat rate stilled to normal and her vision started to come back, she thought she saw a shadow with violet eyes fly across her sight… violet eyes that soon turned green as she looked up into the eyes of Beast Boy yet again today.

"Are you alright?" he asked, rubbing her shoulder. It was then she realized where exactly she had fallen: In his lap.

"I'm fine," she muttered, pulling herself to a stand. He looked up at her with puppy dog eyes, big droopy ears and a sad tail. "Stop begging."

"Works on Star," the changeling shrugged, returning to his normal state. Raven rolled her eyes and returned to her lotus position, fully intent on him leaving her alone for her meditation…

He didn't leave.

"If your going to stay," she hissed under her breathe, her mantra words almost forming on her lips. "Then you have to answer my question… and also tell me why the hell you're feeling trapped enough to make me loose concentration."

"The Mighty Raven lost her concentration?" he joked; the feeling of being trapped returned, but she was ready this time. Shutting her eyes for a moment, she focused on clearing her head before she glared at him.

"You felt it again," she shot back. "Now tell me why."

"That sounded mighty commanding," he chuckled, leaning back on his hands.

"Because you don't have a choice," she replied. "Tell me, now."

"Why do you care?" Beast Boy looked up at her, wagging his eyebrows.

"Because it makes me loose my concentration!" the demon-girl snapped. A black glow started to glow around them, and his eyes widened in fear. He shuddered as he looked in her eyes, and she realized in horror that she had not her normal two, lavender ones, but crimson ones.

Eyes of blood.

Eyes of a demon.

For what seemed like the hundredth time so far, she looked away from him at the horizon. She leveled her breathing and focused on her heart rate, muttering, _'Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos'_ to herself.

When she was satisfied with herself, she stood herself up on the roof. She turned to glare at Beast Boy again for making her loose control… but he wasn't there.

_Where did he go? _She wondered. She felt almost… alone, here on the roof by herself. Shaking the feeling off, she melted into the shadows, reappearing moments later in her room. With a sigh she summoned a book to herself, only to collapse in a heap on her bed. _I'll meditate in here… after a little reading._


	4. Hyper

_AN: _sorry for the shortness of the last chapter, but because of the formatting I chose to do, I had to end it. You see, I plan to do a full chapter of one person's POV (Raven or BB's), and the next half-chapter of the same person's POV (the second half being the alternate person's POV)… you understand as I go on. Gomen again.

**Hyper-**

Her book lay strewn at the end of her bed with her belt and cloak, the day's heat sinking into the coldest recesses of the tower. Raven tried in vain to keep images of the fires of hell out of her mind, but her previous encounter with Beast Boy seemed to weaken her concentrations…

With a final chorus of _'Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos!' _she opened her eyes and stood up. Gazing at the twisted clock across the room, she saw that it was nearing one in the afternoon… had her mind been in that much turmoil? Just from an encounter with Beast Boy?

_Maybe I should of used my mirror. _She muttered in her mind, stretching her legs before her as she readied herself to see her teammates. _I'll have to remember to do that next time it happens… just in case._

Crossing her room, she summoned her belt to her, clasping it around her waist. She decided against putting her cape on as well, the heat aiding in her decision.

She stopped for a moment to enjoy the slight breeze from the doors opening, but the moment didn't last long. Before long she was walking through the corridors that she knew so well; past corridors and entranceways that had too many names and purposes, she found her way into the living room.

Sitting in front of the TV was Robin and Cyborg, with Starfire cheering them on as they played their videogames. Which one they played, Raven didn't know nor care. Alls she wanted right now was a cup of tea and a quiet corner. Maybe she could forget about today…

Of course, the first thing she saw was a green blob shovelling tofu-burgers down its throat.

"Beast Boy," she muttered a greeting. He stopped momentarily to look up at her, before continuing his food binge. She went to put water in the kettle when she noticed one of her tea cups were already out… peering inside of it, she saw the leaves for Chinese tea resting at the bottom of her cup, ready to give a bitter taste to the hot water that needed to be added… she put the kettle on the stove.

He was looking at her when she sat down at the table with him. Trying to ignore his gaze, she summoned her cup and a spoon to herself, getting ready for her tea…

"I didn't think you'd actually like Chinese tea," Beast Boy said randomly, half a tofu-burger still on his plate.

She looked up at him now, "How did you know it was Chinese tea?" she asked.

"Because I put it in your cup," he shrugged. "You were in your room for a long time, so I was gonna bring it up to you when I was finished… you came down first."

"That's strangely… out of character of you," Raven commented. "Are you okay?"

He blinked. "Me? Okay?" he laughed nervously. "I'm fine! Why wouldn't I be?"

"You're being sincere," she pointed out.

"Hey!" the changeling glared. "I resent that!"

"I bet you do," she muttered. The water started to boil, and they slipped into a comfortably silence as she prepared her tea. Using her powers to send everything back to its proper place, she sipped at the amber liquid.

"Do you like it?" he asked. By now the rest of his burger had disappeared.

"It's… unusual," she answered. "Not as bitter as the last time I tasted it…"

"It's not traditional," he shrugged. "Tai thought you'd like it." He got up to put his plates in the sink, only to stop short.

* * *

"_She'll like it!" _Tai encouraged from beside him. _"It's something she would like… not her usual herbal tea, and not the traditional Chinese… what else could be better? It's original! Classic!"_

Beast Boy couldn't help but smile to himself as he silently agreed with the blond haired boy beside him. He took a quick look, only to see Tai give him a fanged grin, bright green eyes dancing with joy.

He looked back up to Raven to see her taking a sip. "Do you like it?" He asked, slowly placing his cup on top of his plate. Why did he feel so nervous all the sudden? It was just Raven…

"It's… unusual," she responded, looking up at him. He had to bit back a gasp as he realised just how pretty her lavender eyes were… "Not as bitter as the last time I tasted it…"

"It's not traditional," shrugging his shoulders; he started to stand up… anything to hide what he suddenly started to feel. "Tai thought you'd like it." He moved to take the first step towards the sink, only to stop once he realised what he had said…

His breathe quickened as he looked back to where the blond had been sitting, only to see an empty seat. The dishes slipped from his hands, only to be caught in a black aura.

"Beast Boy?" he looked up at her, only to see that she had risen from her chair to check on him. "Are you okay? You just… froze up. And who's Tai?"

His heart started to race and his entire body felt restless and weak at the same time. His eyes didn't seem to focus on any one particular point as he turned and looked at her. Her eyes spoke volumes of how worried she was as she stepped up to him to feel his head.

"Are you okay?" She asked again. "You seem to be a little disorient-…"

That's when his world went black.


	5. Ventilating

Sorry it took me so long to update. I'm trying my best to remember, really I am! I was just busy… I had a trip up island and I've needed a few lazy days and what not. Nothing to worry about… now I'm updating again!

**-Ventilating**

_Tai sat on his favourite rock by the stream, looking out into the deep pools of water. The urge to submerge himself in its depths wasn't lost on him… neither was the urge to feel his lungs burn with the need of oxygen._

_He lowered a foot into the chilly waters, slowly sliding into the stream. Without taking a breathe he pushed himself beneath, grasping onto loose roots to keep him under…_

_He looked up towards the surface with green eyes, watching the crooked branches of a willow overhead… and a shadow?_

_Dark splotches danced across his vision as he shut his eyes again, the need for oxygen trying to betray him. He tangled his fingers deeper within the roots, keeping him there._

_Soon enough the need for oxygen grew too great, and his mouth opened to try and suck it's life force from around it… only to pull water into his lungs. A sharp pain hit him as his body tried to rid itself of the liquid, only to draw more in…_

_That's when he felt himself being pulled back to the surface, and onto the bank of the stream. He coughed the water out of his lungs, water dripping from his blond hair._

_Finally, when he was able, he looked up to his savior; a petite girl with shining red hair and crimson eyes, wearing a look of deep worry._

_Never had he seen her before._

"_Why did you save me?" he asked the girl, tears coming to his eyes. "Why didn't you let the gates of hell welcome me to where I belong? Why!"_

"_Because," the girl whispered, wrapping her arms around herself. "No one who is needed as much as I sense you are, should die of their own hand."_

"_Needed?" he hissed, struggling to a stand. "To be needed is to be loved, and I am not loved in this world."_

Beast Boy stretched from his curled position, blinking open his eyes. He panicked for a few moments when he didn't recognize where he was, only to see the familiar forms of Cyborg and Raven in the doorway.

Slowly turning away from them, he saw Starfire dozing in a chair next to him. Cocking his head to the side in confusion, he reached forward to nudge her shoulder… only to stop. His hand was covered into a fine fuzz, and his fingernails had narrowed and sharpened to deadly claws.

He pushed himself to a sitting position as he continued to look at his hand, just to realize that he wasn't wearing his usual uniform. Somehow he had been changed into the thin robes he had only seen in hospitals…

Looking around again, he finally realized where he was: Jump City Hospital.

"Beast Boy!" Cyborg's cheery voice entered his mind, and his robotic friend came into view. "What happened to you? We were all worried!"

The shouting woke Starfire, who opened her tired eyes and offered him a smile, before she launched herself at him without warning, squeezing the life from him. "Friend Beast Boy! I was so worried you would stay in the sleep of the Coma for eternity!"

"Can't… Breathe…" Beast Boy gasped over his shoulder. "Need… Air…"

"Cut it out Star," Raven muttered, prying them apart with her powers. Beast Boy sent her a smile of gratitude, which she ignored, before looking at his hand again.

"Woah… what happened to your hand?" Cyborg asked, snatching the green limb to himself as he examined it. "It's all… different."

"You have grown up in a short time, Friend Beast Boy," Star nodded her agreement.

"Grown up?" the changeling blinked. "What do you mean? I'm still the same, aren't I?"

"What the-!" Robin's voice sounded from behind them, along with the clatter of objects hitting the floor. Beast Boy whipped around to look at their leader's shocked face. "Beast Boy? What happened to you!"

Not being able to take it any longer, he pulled away from everyone, standing on the hospital bed. He looked around quickly, spotting a small bathroom in the corner; transforming into a fly, he zipped into the bathroom, only to transform back and slam the door shut.

Taking deep, steady breathes, he turned towards the mirror with his eyes shut. His friends started to bang on the door, but that didn't matter. Slowly he opened his eyes to find out what he looked like now…

Only to see Tai.

"T-tai..?" he stuttered. "What are you doing here…?"

"_I can't let you see yourself, Gar," _the blond boy spoke from inside the mirror. _"I know it seems cruel, and it probably is… but you have to do what I never got to do, and you can't make the mistakes I made… this is just… incentive. If you stay calm, you'll look as you always do, don't worry."_

With a strangled cry he fell back, sliding down the wall behind him.

* * *

Raven walked up behind them as Star launched herself at Beast Boy. "Can't… Breathe…" The green boy gasped out. "Need… Air…"

"Cut it out Star," she muttered, summoning her dark magic to pry them apart. Beast Boy took a few deep breathes before turning to give her a smile, which she disregarded as she looked at him.

What had happened to him?

"Woah… what happened to your hand?" she heard Cyborg ask. Why stop at his hand? His entire being was different, from the aura around him to the features on his face. "It's all… different."

"You have grown up in a short time, Friend Beast Boy," Star agreed with him; she must have thought this as something like her transformation a few years prior… and who knows? Maybe it was.

"Grown up?" He blinked, and she couldn't help but think he looked almost cute when he did that... "What do you mean? I'm still the same, aren't I?"

"What the-!" Raven cringed at the sound of their lunch hitting the floor, accompanied by Robin's confusion… the look on their leader's face was no better. "Beast Boy? What happened to you!"

It turned out that was not what the changeling needed to hear, as he stood up on his bed and transformed into a fly. Before any of them out respond to his sudden reaction, he flew to the small bathroom in the corner, turned back to himself and slammed the door shut.

Quick as lightening the rest of the team were outside the door, banging and asking to be let in. With a sigh Raven closed her eyes, concentrating… with a mutter of, _'Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos!'_ she cast a sound proof barrier around the room, leaving the walls shadowed and evil. She didn't really care as she pushed her way through her friends, slowly melting into shadows before creeping under the door…

Materializing inside the little room, she watched as Beast Boy slid down the wall, only to pull his knees to his chest as his shoulders started to shake. Her hands balled into fists as she silently blamed her teammates outside for his actions, and without thinking took a step forwards to comfort him…

She stopped when she saw the mirror.

From the corner of her eye she hadn't seen her reflection, but the image of a girl with shining red locks and crimson eyes looking back at them worriedly; but when she turned to get a better look, alls she saw was herself. Shaking it off as her imagination, she crouched down in front of the green boy, cautiously placing a pale hand on his forearm.

His reaction was immediate. He looked up at her with a growl, which soon turned to sadness as he realized she was no enemy. Slowly he looked back down at his hands, tears starting to fall down his cheeks.

Raven just looked at him.

His hair had grown long and wild, a lone strand falling into his eyes, which, though they remained their green hues, now had the pupils of a cat. His fangs were longer, and his face seemed as sharp as his new claws. His body had grown again, and she didn't doubt that he would even tower over Cyborg now… and that fine fur that lined all his features.

It took her a few moments, but she finally realized that he was muttering something under his breathe. Gently she picked up his chin in her hand, forcing him to look at her.

"Beast Boy?" she asked, her tone suggesting she thought he might break. "What's wrong?"

"I can't change back," he laughed. A shiver went up her spine as she looked into his dead eyes. "Do you know how long it's been since I've lost control? Never! I've never lost control! And now Tai tells me I have to be calm or else I won't look normal and that I have to do what he never did and-"

"Beast boy!" she silenced him with her voice, taking a deep breathe. "Okay… tell me now, who is Tai?"

"Tai is someone from my past," he laughed again, shaking his head out of her grasp. "Someone from my entire family's past… well, family on my father's side. He's more of a story really, told to us as a kid at bedtime to help us get to sleep, and then as we become older, we dream of him and his adventures, his family. I think I'm the only person in my family who ever took him for what he really was. A story. A figment of the imagination."

"Then why do you keep seeing him?" she asked, making him look at her once more.

"Why do you care?" he challenged. "Why are you even here?"

"Because I'm worried," she shot back. "We're all worried."

"Worried enough to ever ask me why I spend endless hours in front of the TV instead of sleeping?" his voice boomed as he stood up. Raven stood up also, only to realize he stood a good two heads higher than her. "Worried enough to notice how I never speak of my past? Worried enough to even care? Wow, I'm really touched."

"Calm down!" she yelled back at him. "Here I am trying to be nice and you criticize me?"

The silence that followed was deafening, but he seemed to shrink as they started to register in his mind… if she, the Ice Queen of all Ice, was worried about him, what about the others?

She caught him as he fell forwards, his eyes drooping to a shut, and witnessed as his body slowly started to take its regular form. Granted, his hair was still a little too long and his fangs still spouted over his lips, but they could worry about that later.

Shutting her eyes as well, she let her senses feel if he was okay, like they had almost 18 hours prior when he collapsed in the kitchen. She allowed a small smile when she realized that his heart rate, blood pressure and breathing were all normal, and slowly opened the door.


	6. Witness

**Witness**

Two weeks after the incident in the hospital… if one wanted to be precise, it had been 13 days, 7 hours, 53 minutes, 18 seconds and counting… not that she was. Raven was simply worried over him, but not too worried. Not any more worried then the rest of the team…

At least, that's what she kept telling herself.

She didn't tell Robin or the others what Beast Boy had confided in her, as she herself was still in a little confusion over it… but she tried not to let it bother her… instead, she would wait here in the mornings around the time he woke up, and when he opened his door, she would walk with him down to the kitchen as she tried to talk. Not something she was good at.

But he seemed to be appreciative for it, and it calmed him down. She knew because he always left his room in the beastly form he had taken on in the hospital, and after a few kind words, would change back.

Some key things still stayed different though. His hair, though not as long as before, was long enough for him to pull back in to a messy pony tail, and he was still at least half a head taller than Raven. Also, his fangs still protruded from his lips… but by far the most disturbing thing was how his eyes seemed just a little less cheerful everyday…

A groan from the room in front of her stirred her from her thoughts.

She waited a few minutes, getting ready for him to step out of the door… he seemed to have a routine that he followed to the letter. So when he didn't step out of the metal confines that made up his door, she grew even more worried. Worried to the point that she muttered her words of choice before literally melting into shadow and slipping through the fine cracks of the door…

When she rematerialized, the first thing she noticed was the mess. Eyes narrowing in annoyance, she commanded her dark magic to clean the room before her, and in moments clothes were flying in to the a wardrobe as other knickknacks started to line shelves… she made her way over to Beast Boy's bed, seeing that he was still asleep.

She sat down next to him, her hand automatically reaching up to feel his forehead… no fever. He turned jerked away from her, a pained expression coming to his features…

Her decision was made within seconds, and as stupid as it would have seemed in a normal state of mind, she went through with it.

Shutting her eyes, she concentrated on pulling her subconscious away from her living body, and submerged herself into his dream…

_Opening her eyes, she looked out from beneath the tangles branches of a weeping willow to the boy that sat cross legged at the lake… Beast Boy! She took a step and found herself floating closer towards him, only to sit beside him in silence._

"_You are needed," she found herself saying, instead of the worried lecture she had started to form in her mind. She tried to look over to him, tried to gage his reaction, but found herself looking down at their reflections… but they weren't there._

"_By whom?" he asked her… but it wasn't the kind, if a little high pitched, voice of Beast Boy that she heard… no, this voice was lower, laced with tones of depression. It fit the face of the blond haired boy that sat in place of the green boy she was expecting._

"_Raija," Raven watched, almost in a trance, hearing her own voice say those words, and seeing the lips of the pretty red head say them…_

"_How do you know about her?" the boy demanding. He reached over and forced her to look up at him, gripping her shoulder with one had so tight that it hurt… "Tell me you didn't do anything to Raija!"_

"_I didn't do anything to her," tears started to come to her eyes… but why? "I promise I didn't… but she will need you more than anything. You will have to raise her, and love her, just as she loves you."_

"_What does it matter?" he snapped at her. His green eyes flashed with anger._

"_Because you have to learn to love," she almost chuckled, but held it back, looking to where her hands were folded in her lap. "If you don't… if you don't, you'll ruin their lives."_

"_Ruin whose lives?" he did laugh. It was a hollow sound that stung at her ears. "My mother's? The Tribe's? Yours?"_

_She looked up at him slowly, taking care to rake her eyes over albino skin and tense muscles before she looked back into his intoxicating green eyes. "No… you'll ruin the lives of the two who have to fulfill your life's wish; the two who are reliving these very moments in our bodies."_

Raven was jerked to reality so suddenly that she fell forwards onto her knees, only to look up towards Beast Boy who slowly sat up. It took him a few moments, but he saw her there finally… her presence didn't surprise him, and she wondered briefly if he had seen her in the confines of his own dream… but that didn't matter. She needed to know something, and she needed to know it now.

"Who am I in Tai's past?"


	7. Choosing to Run

**Choosing to Run**

Raven sat there as she waited for him to speak, and he just stared. His green made her shiver, and she had to look way; they were too intense. "Well?"

"I didn't live in Tai's past," she heard him stand up, but didn't look up at him. "So how should I know?"

"Didn't you see me in your dream?" she hissed out. "I saw you… but your reflection was of a boy with blond hair. That was Tai, right?"

"Yeah, so?" he heard him moving across the room.

"And I was there," she stood up, still not finding herself able to look up at him. "But my reflection was of a girl with red hair and eyes. Who is she?"

"You mean Lilly?" he scoffed. "Lilly is just another figment of my imagination, just like the Tai and Raija and the village and _everything. _Where did you put my shirts?"

Now she looked up at him. Her eyes flared with anger as she stared him down, making it his turn to look away. He sauntered over to the mirror on the wall, and she saw the raven on his back… as well as a glimpse of her demonic eyes in the mirror.

Muttering _Azarath Metrion Zinthos! _she calmed her nerves.

"Why would you even want to be in Tai's past?" he asked, falling back onto the ground. He pulled his knees to his chest and stared at his reflection. "Sure, he has almost a fairytale life, but he doesn't get what he wants. The person he loves most ends up leaving him. His daughter scorns him for keeping her in Africa for so long. The village ended up forcing him to leave, because he's disrupting their rituals and the nature around them. It's not a happy fairytale. Why would you want to be there?"

She pondered on words to say as she walked up to the mirror as well, eyes tracing over the raven on his back… so many questions about Tai and Lilly, let alone that raven, and she needed to get all the answers.

Crouching behind him, a hand on his shoulder, she decided on the first question to ask; 'Why don't you believe?' But something stopped her… and that something was in the mirror. Staring back out at her was a smiling red head; wrapping an arm around a blond haired boy she could only assume to be Tai. And when she turned her head to look at Beast Boy, she realized her arm was about to copy the red head's… she retreated, cradling a wrist in her lap.

"Why don't you believe in Tai?"

He laughed as he looked up at her, and she was horrified to see no humour in his eyes. "Tai was a bed time story that my dad used to tell me. A story that supposed to die with the parents, and then maybe, just maybe, come back to you later when you have kids of your own to put to bed… but no, Tai haunts all my dreams, sleeping or not, to the point that he's now telling me that I can never look upon my own reflection again unless I do what he never did. And that's a rather pointless threat, because he didn't get to do a lot."

Raven stared at him, the weight of his words doing nothing to push her away. She shifted closer as she tried to think of what to say next, opening her mind in case he let a stray thought tumble out and help her… nothing. It was almost like he had a brick wall built around his mind.

It was Beast Boy, who opened his mouth to speak next, but just right then, she felt someone prod into her self conscious – nothing nearly serious to harm her, and nothing she couldn't bat away easily, but it seemed to push her forwards, so that just as Beast Boy started to ask why she was staring at him, they kissed.

* * *

Beast Boy looked back at her stare, wanting desperately to move out of her line of vision. Why was she staring at him like that? _Maybe she likes you._ Tai's voice rang out in his head, and he tried to ignore it… instead, he opened his mouth to ask her why she was looking at him so… intently.

Then she kissed him.

Time must have frozen. No doubt about it; the entire planet probably would of blown up by now with how much emotion Raven seemed to pour into one tiny, innocent kiss… which was probably why he didn't push away. No, instead he slowly wrapped an arm around her waist, and dared to lean in closer. His eyes drifted shut.

No explosions. Time _must_ have stopped.

All at once everything shattered apart, but not with auras of black and explosions as he thought, but a pain in his lower back. He pushed away from her, eyes still shut, and yelped in pain. He cursed profanities and demanded to know just what she had done to him… but when he finally calmed down enough to open his eyes, she was gone.


	8. Epilogue

_Special thanks to Fernu; it's the critics that help me the most. One more, explanation-chapter after this one. Ask questions and they'll be answered._

**Epilogue**

Beast Boy stared at the spot where Raven had sat, pondering over what had just happened. Had they really kissed? Was he still dreaming? Touching his still-tingling lips, he couldn't force himself to believe he had. Shaking his head, he felt his still-aching back, before looking at the mirror. He almost jumped out of his skin.

It was his own reflection.

Dragging his hand through his hair, he double checked his appearance; he was taller than he had been the last time he had seen himself, and his hair was longer too. On a better note, his fangs were almost the right size again… with a sigh he dragged himself to his new height, and turned to look at his birthmark. He stared at his back in amazement; it was gone.

His morning was bizarre enough as it was, but it only seemed to get worse; first he couldn't get his uniform on, then he couldn't find any of his shirts. He had to show up at Starfire's room wearing only a baggy pair of pants. The Alien girl had giggled at him, but took his uniform to fix before producing a shirt (white, thankfully) and going with him to breakfast.

They ran out of tofu, and Cyborg gave him the ultimatum of either eating regular, everyday bacon and eggs, or washing the dishes for the next three months. He poured himself a cup of coffee, grabbed an apple, and resisted the overwhelming temptation to hit his head against the table, all without saying a word to his friends. His friends must have noticed his strange behavior, and Robin sat down across from him.

"Are you okay Beast Boy?" The Boy-Wonder asked. Beast Boy looked up at him blankly, and took a large gulp of his coffee; he could almost feel the adrenaline pushing in his veins, but ignored it.

"I'm trying to decide if I'm dreaming or not," he answered. He looked at the faces surrounding him, and blinked in confusion. "Where's Raven?"

"That ol' sour puss?" Cyborg laughed. "Probably up on the roof or something… where else would she be? This _is_ Raven we're talking about!"

Beast boy nodded, and in a moment he'd turned into a big, black bird, and flew out of the room. He found the nearest window – three doors to the left, up the staircase, and through the second door on the right proved to find one – and then beat his powerful wings to get himself onto the roof. Sure enough, sitting cross legged in mid-air with her cloak floating behind her, was Raven.

He tried to remember the feeling of pulling back his human form, and for a few moments it eluded his grasp. It was long enough for Raven to settle on the roof and open her eyes to look at him; when he did change, he fell into a heap in front of her.

They stared at each other for a few moments, and Beast Boy could feel the tension thicken in the air. Raven made no attempt to help, just stared back at him. He fixed his position to match hers, smiled, and said "so… are you going to pinch me yet? I think I'm still dreaming."

She continued staring at him for a few long moments, and then she laughed. The sheer shock of her laughter was enough to surprise him into laughing back; her laugh was clear and airy, and made his heart feel light. It brought back old memories of a short-lived crush, long before Terra.

"You actually thought…" she was still chuckling, and had to wipe tears of mirth from her eyes. "… that I'd pinch y-you… for a stupid reason, like that..?"

Beast Boy shrugged. "You've done it before, haven't' you?"

"I guess," Raven calmed down, and smiled at him. "… Are you going to explain anything about Tai and Lilly?" He nodded, and settled down.

He explained about Tai; how he and his mother had moved from England to Africa as a contract, and how Tai had married the Village Leader's daughter. He told her all about Raija, Tai's daughter, and detailed everything from the girl's first words and steps, to the words she said at Tai's funeral almost 20 years after her birth.

He told her about Tai's and Lilly's first meeting; how Lilly had saved him from himself time and time again, only to fall in love with him. He told her about Tai's growing feelings for her, and inevitably, about Lilly's 'day of destruction'.

Raven sat silently the whole time, absorbing the information as he spoke it, and continued to watch him when he finally finished. He nervously picked at the hem of his shirt, looking back into her stare.

"I can understand how you and Tai are related," Raven said at a length. "It's like a blood bond… memories were passed from father to son until someone could be found to do what Tai never could do. But how am I related to Lilly?"

"What..?" Beast Boy blinked at her. "I never… how did you get that from everything I said?"

"It's the most logical explanation," Raven shrugged, amusement on her face. "After all… you have that birthmark, right? Lilly gave Tai the mark and it was passed on through blood lines, until you got it. That makes sense… but if I'm Lilly in Tai's past, how am I related to her..?"

"I dunno," Beast Boy shrugged. "Maybe it's because you're part demon..? I mean, Lilly was a full blooded demon…"

"She didn't look like a demon," Raven said with a pout.

"Looks can be deceiving," something seemed to click into Beast Boy's mind. "What I really wanna know is why you're showing so much emotion… won't you blow something up?"

"What?" It was Raven's turn to be confused. "I'm not… I would never… am I?"

"Yeah," Beast Boy nodded. "I noticed it when we… you know… kissed…"

"Oh…"

Beast Boy watched as Raven turned a pleasant shade of pink, and grinned. "Hey… I think that's a question I can answer."

"Okay," she tried to control her blush, and met his gaze. The changeling's grin grew, and he leaned forwards, pressing another kiss to the demon girl's lips… Raven blushed more, but leaned in to meet him.

An eternity later, Beast Boy pulled away from her, and smiled.

"I'm your chosen one; just as Tai was Lilly's. Your chosen one to show Emotion to safely, for all time… and don't you dare laugh at me!"

Raven couldn't help it; a smile cracked over her features, and laughter erupted from her lips… and when she calmed down, she kissed him again.

And they got the 'happily every after' that Tai and Lilly could never have.

_-Owari._


End file.
